I'm afraid to die
by Cyane2000
Summary: "Although… there is one thing." "What is it?" "Lucy, have you ever kissed a girl?" Erza asked out of the blue. There is still one thing Erza hasn't crossed off her bucket list.


**I do not own Fairy Tail.**

 **Please enjoy the story, even though it's a sad one.**

She didn't even need to say anything. He just sat there and waited for her story to come out, as it would, since it was Lucy. And Lucy was still Lucy, no matter how you looked at it.

But when it didn't come, he exchanged confused looks with Happy. The cat shrugged in a mix of sadness and confusion.

"Are you all right, Luce?" Natsu eventually asked. He felt uncomfortable.

"I'll be in a while, thanks, Natsu." She sighed and looked at her cup of tea again.

"What happened? I know you went to visit Erza last night, but…" Natsu gulped. A the very second he'd uttered her name, tears had started leaving her eyes.

"Luce? Oi, oi… Don't cry…" he said, at a loss of words.

"It's fine." But Natsu had touched upon the real problem. Erza. He hated that Erza was the reason Lucy was crying, but since it was Erza, he could hardly beat her up for a whole bunch of reasons that were quite complicated.

She was ill. It could not be cured. It was an indestructible disease. Erza's time was limited now. Porlyusica had said one month and no one in the guild could question her knowledge and experience. After all, she'd lost her own child to the same illness.

One month. That had been three weeks ago. The redhead had spent her time well. She'd gone on one last mission with her Team. She'd reconciled with Jellal and had said goodbye to Milliana, Wally and Sho. She'd made her testimony and she still visited the guild almost every day. Still smiling and breaking up fights, though they became less and less frequent.

Of all people, Lucy had been shocked the most. Maybe even more shocked than Erza. The rest of their Team had frantically searched for a medicine, until Erza told them to stop a couple of days ago. A huge strife had followed between Natsu and Erza and eventually even more between Lucy and Erza. Since then, Erza had left town and came back yesterday, shut herself in her room and wouldn't let anyone enter. Not even Master or Mira.

So Lucy went to check up on her. To her surprise, the redhead did let her in. Instead of facing a broken, crushed Erza she'd anticipated, she found a collected, melancholic young woman. They'd talked for a while. Without blinking or missing a beat, Erza said she could feel how little time she'd left. So casually, so nonchalantly.

They were in Erza's bedroom by now. It was every bit as Erza as it could get. Girly yet full of armour suits and swords. A big photograph covered one wall. Everyone from the guild on it. Lucy remembered the photo. It had been taken by Jason right after they'd won the Grand Magic Games. Everyone from both teams was there: Laxus, Gajeel, Juvia, Mirajane, Cana, strange enough even Mystogan, Natsu, Gray, Erza herself next to Wendy, Elfman, Lucy and Happy, Carla, Pantherlily, Master, Mavis, Wakaba, Macao, Romeo, Levy, Droy, Jet, Laki, Nab, Bisca, Alzac, Asuka, Lisanna…

"I thought it fit." Erza stated calmly, as she sat on her bed. She wasn't wearing her armour.

"It does." Lucy said, barely holding it together.

"I appreciate you're here, Lucy. Did you want to ask something?" the redhead was still the powerful, strong person she always had been.

"Not really. I just wanted to see how you were and apologize." Lucy mumbled, looking at the ground.

"Apologize? What for?" the older girl was genuinely surprised.

"Because we had such a fight a couple of days ago. I'm sorry for what I shouted at you. I didn't mean it like that."

"I know." Erza said softly. "Maybe I was wrong, too. I really value it that you've tried to find a cure. I'd only just accepted my own fate, and then you were there. It gave me hope where no hope is allowed."

"It's just so unfair. I couldn't have given up on you like that, Erza."

Erza smiled. "It's okay. I've got absolutely no regrets in life. I'm happy that I was able to meet all of you. My life was worth living."

"So there's nothing you want to do anymore?" Lucy asked. She knew Erza had a secret bucket list.

"No, I've crossed the last thing off, where I was yesterday."

"What did you do, actually?" Lucy asked curiously.

"I donated a billion Jewel to the specialized bakery of Fiore."

Lucy sweatdropped. Was there anything more like Erza? It wouldn't surprise her if that shop had become specialized just because of her.

"Although… there is one thing."

"What is it?"

"Lucy, have you ever kissed a girl?" Erza asked out of the blue.

"What? No, I haven't." the blonde said confused. "Erza, do you want to…?"

"No!" the knight said embarrassed. "Not especially with you, although you're quite pretty, Lucy, but it just isn't… I could never."

Lucy decided to laugh it off. "I can find a girl for you who's pretty and more than willing to kiss with you, Erza."

"Excuse me?" the redhead said with raised eyebrows. Then she got serious again and the glint in her eyes disappeared. "I could never do that. Ask someone to kiss me when I'm about to die is just…"

Meanhile, Lucy's heartbeat had gotten faster. She decided it in a split second. She turned toward Erza, who was facing the other wall.

With gentle fingers she grabbed Erza's chin. The redhead was forced to look at her, the embarrassment aside.

"You're beautiful", Lucy whispered. She meant it.

Erza just looked at her with those pained, soft eyes. Lucy pulled her closer and leaned in. the redhead smelled like strawberries. It made her smile. As their lips touched, Lucy could feel a spark growing in her chest. Erza's lips were so soft. She got lost in the moment.

Erza was the first to pull back. She looked at the Celestial Spirit Mage finally letting her fear and anxiousness seep out, along with some tears.

"I don't want to die."

Lucy just held her for a long time. It might have been hours or an entire night they just sat there. Breathing. Thinking. Finding comfort in each other. In some way, it might have been her goodbye.

Neither wanted to think of that. They still had time to sit there, doing nothing, with Lucy's arm around Erza's shoulder and Erza's hands around Lucy's waist. They still had time to think of what might have been if Erza was healthy. What might have happened if they hadn't just stuck to that one kiss.

For now, they still had time to think about that.

 **The end.**

 **This is based on a story that really happened (to me personally), so this is for the person I lost a few days after that.**

 **I hope it was realistic for the Fairy Tail-world. Well, maybe it wouldn't even be realistic in the real world. Any review or comment is very welcome.**


End file.
